PATIENT PROFILE
Age: 21
Gender: Female
Topic: Psychiatry
Chat Rating: star star star star_half star_border
Location: Pune

i am suffering from mental stress. i m not at all feeling happy. actually i had a breakup and even have issues with friends so now i completely feel lonely.. before i use to be person with full of live but now i hardly have fun.. i just like to be alone.. i don't feel like even smiling.. can you pls help me with this

Do you have any of the following conditions? None
Which of the following is affected due to your condition? Sleep Work
i don't know what to say.. i just know that i am not at all feeling good.. i start crying after every hour.. i m an office going girl and i m not at all giving even my 10% to the work.. whole day i m just lost in thought.. i can't even sleep properly.. daily i sleep while crying and wakeup crying.. before i have 100s of frnds.. every day i talk to many frnds hangout with them but now i don't even give a reply to any of them.. who was my bestfrnds before now i just hate them.. i even had avery very bad breakup and i know the main problem is my breakup only.. i loved that guy alot.. like if he is happy i m happy if even for few sec he is sad my whole day becmes the worst one.. if he is with me i the happiest girl in the world.. i dance party means enjoy whole day but whenever he fights with me i feel like killing my self.. but know i m done been sad.. i want to feel happy again.. but everytime i try been happy i just fail.. i just miss him alot..????????
Dr.
Good Morning xxxx! I am here to help you, please tell me more about your problem.
i don't know what to say.. i just know that i am not at all feeling good.. i start crying after every hour.. i m an office going girl and i m not at all giving even my 10% to the work.. whole day i m just lost in thought.. i can't even sleep properly.. daily i sleep while crying and wakeup crying.. before i have 100s of frnds.. every day i talk to many frnds hangout with them but now i don't even give a reply to any of them.. who was my bestfrnds before now i just hate them.. i even had avery very bad breakup and i know the main problem is my breakup only.. i loved that guy alot.. like if he is happy i m happy if even for few sec he is sad my whole day becmes the worst one.. if he is with me i the happiest girl in the world.. i dance party means enjoy whole day but whenever he fights with me i feel like killing my self.. but know i m done been sad.. i want to feel happy again.. but everytime i try been happy i just fail.. i just miss him alot..
Dr.
Okay
Dr.
Would you like to discuss this over a call
yes i want to.. but right know i m in office.. so i just can't talk over phone
Dr.
So what time is convenient for you
at 7 in evening.. will it do for you too
Dr.
Okay... Works with me
Dr.
Will give you an appointment for 7pm
yes thanku so much..
Dr.
Just make sure you are available at that time
yes yes..
Dr.
Great
Dr.
Hi
yes dr. i m here..
Dr.
You want to start our call now?
yes dr. we can
Dr.
xxxx, I am calling you now. Please pickup.
Dr.
So basically you are feeling disconnected post your break up
yes bcoz of breakup.. but also bcoz of my some frnds.. like whom i use to called bestfrnds
Dr.
Okay
Dr.
So you not happy because of all this?
yes ma'am i m not happy bcoz of all this..
Dr.
Okay when did your break up happened
3 month before
Dr.
And what happened with your friends ??
my childhood bestfrnd left me when i had my breakup bcoz she thinks ki week people do breakups and all.. and i don't know how to handle things so she just left.. that she thinks ki i will even gonna leave her as i left my bf..
weak*
Dr.
Okay
Dr.
Do you think this is true xxxx
i only knows this reason.. nothing else.. she just said this and blocked me from every social media acc
Dr.
18:58: Do you think this is true xxxx
i don't know.. sometimes i think yes.. and then other times its like she left me bcoz her bf don't like me so from 1 year her bf was asking her to stop talking to me.. and she used to reply ki xxxx is my childhood frnd i can't leave her.. so yes sometime i do think that this might be another reason that why she left
Dr.
Okay
Dr.
Whatever her reason is xxxx... Don't you think that probably you need to let go her and respect her decision?
Dr.
See I understand losing people from life is not easy
Dr.
However holding it and just thinking about why they left will just waste your time
Dr.
What do you think
i tried doing that.. its been 3 month dr. i m just not feeling good.. every day i miss both of them hell alot.. bcoz before my breakup i used to talk to them daily.. and i used to be the happiest soul alive.. for me world used to be beautiful.. but now as both of them are not with me.. i just hate evrything.. and yes i asked for breakup but i miss himm.. in this 3 months we have talked several times bcoz day without talking to him is a big nightmare for me.. so i used to msg him.. and even he do that sometime.. but with my bestfrnd i never even know where she is.. not for onces i have seen her talked to her..
everyone says moveon xxxx u have so many frnds.. u can overcme this.. but no one trys to understnd me..
Dr.
Okay
Dr.
xxxx you tell me what all you tried?
Dr.
In order to help you move on
i started taking classes.. and i even joined yoga class.. my office is going on.. i changed my place.. i changed phone.. so that i just don't have any photos of themm..
Dr.
Okay
Dr.
xxxx tell me what was the reason you broke up with him
Dr.
Why you felt it was necessary
Dr.
xxxx you there?
i have been dating him for 4 years.. and 4 years is a long time right.. the least u can expect from your partner is that he trust you and share everything with you what is going on in his life.. he was in big problem and he never said anything about it to me.. and problem was financial issues.. he was not having money and something like that.. and when i cme to know about it.. i asked him that why he had not told me anything.. he said he thinks i will never understand bcoz i can't face that problem anytime in my life.. actually my father is so rich and he is from middle class family.. so i used to give him alot of gift means what ever he wants and he never gifted me anything.. and everyday he used to say xxxx ki me kuch nhi deskta tujhe toh please chod mt dena mujhe and i was like ki i have everything i just want you.. i don't want your money..
but when he was going throught the from
he said ki if i will ask you about the money my male ego with get hurt
i was like seriously.. we r dating each other from 4 years
and u r bringing your male ego in between
Dr.
Okay
so he said yes every girl thinks ki she should have a rich bf and u r not having one so it might cme to your mind ka ki why he is so poor and all
i said its been 4 years and you just understnd me.. he insulted me by saying ki u can be a bitch in future.. bcoz u r so rich.. u just want your father's money nothing else
i was like stop it.. if i only want money i would have never dated u..
so i said we can't be in a relationship where the boy just not trust me at all..
and even my father won't agree for him at any point of life.. so better stay away
Dr.
Okay so you did what you felt right at that time
Dr.
You thought from long term perspective?
yess
Dr.
Don't you think that's a good decision on your end ?
i everytime think of long term result with him.. bcoz i really want him to be my future.. but life took a big u-turn..
i don't know that decision was good or not..
Dr.
Okay
Dr.
Tell me if you go back to him now... Don't you think you will face these problems again
Dr.
Because you can not change your father being rich and that's not your fault
Dr.
What you can do is support him in his difficult time which you did
yes i will face them all.. every day..
Dr.
So xxxx atleast for now it's a wise decision... Because it making you think about all this
i tried to do that.. but bcoz of his male ego he said he don't want my help.. how stupid is this.. like i love him.. where this ego cmes in between yrr
Dr.
That's his decision xxxx... Not everyone is open and there is nothing wrong or right about it
but everyone said i did wrong.. i should have given him time..
Dr.
Okay
Dr.
But everyone will have different opinions about everything
dr. i was his gf.. if he is not opened with me then whom he want in his life..
Dr.
We can't think of what everyone will say
Dr.
What is important is what works for you the best
Dr.
Let me give you one relationship advice.. xxxx it's very important in a relationship that we accept the partner the way he or she is.. with his strengths as well as weaknesses
Dr.
We can't just accepts good things and deny bad things
Dr.
You tried to accept the way he was
Dr.
Rich poor or whatever
Dr.
However at times people still have to move on in life because certain things are difficult to change
i too don't want to think what everyone says.. but u only tell me na that how can i help myself when 24/7 everyone is coming and saying xxxx tune galt kia.. and ab ro mt.. ab sad mt ho.. listen to it every single day it is making me more weak..
Dr.
Because xxxx you are paying attention to it
Dr.
Tell me that's their perspective xxxx
Dr.
That does not mean it's right
Dr.
They are not living your life.. they are gonna judge from their perspective
Dr.
And it's okay if you maintain some distance for now
Dr.
See people will come and go... Friends, colleagues... What will stay with you is you, your health
Dr.
That's is most important right now
Dr.
We all have to take certain steps in life which other people might not agree with you but you need to be sure how is good for you and stick with it
dr. u know what.. i am having a joined family.. since my birth i have never been alone for even a single min.. like i don't know how to eat food sitting alone.. every min i have some one to share things with.. but for futher studies i cme to xxxx.. and here for one year i was so happy.. enjoying every min of my day.. but then people started showing me what the bad world is.. i have never seen that before.. u will not belive it i tried to kill myself 2 times.. bcoz here in xxxx people are so bad when it cmes to frndship.. bht that time i was having my bf and my bestfrnd by my side.. and actually my bf saved me.. and know he is just not with me.. he changed pune changed him too.. and i m left with those people bcoz of whom i tried to commite sucide..
and again they r showlly killing me.. by there actions and thoughts..
Dr.
xxxx let me tell you one thing...
Dr.
We all are social animals and love to have company
and now i don't have my bf and my bestfrnd too.. to save me
Dr.
Feel better around people
Dr.
But it's important to start depending on yourself too
Dr.
As you move on in life you will realise that people go away
Dr.
We lose many friends because everyone gets busy
Dr.
But we keep making new friends
Dr.
Even I was like you... Love socializing a lot... However now I know that I can be dependent on myself
Dr.
Because that is something we have to learn
Dr.
And of course this you will learn with age
Dr.
With some time
Dr.
But ending our life is not a solution
Dr.
I understand your concern but start learning how to be emotionally independent
Dr.
Strong
i don't want to learn it.. my family says that u r never alone.. i have a big family.. they all are crazy people.. even someone will meet them for onces na he or she will fall in love with them.. if they can be so good.. why not frnds can remain the same..
Dr.
You are just 21!! Enjoy your life... Its beautiful... You will meet many people in life on who you can be with
Dr.
So when you have some beautiful family why do you news other people to be nice
Dr.
Everything is not perfect in life
Dr.
Respect what is there for you rather than correcting what is not
before xxxx i don't remember when was the last time i cried.. and here in xxxx now i don't remember when was the last time i laughed..
Dr.
Its always difficult in diffrent city
Dr.
We are away from our friends family and thats why its more challenging
Dr.
xxxx... Dont focus on problem...Start focusing on solution
Dr.
Which will help you to come out of it
dr. i love my family.. but i don't have them here.. they r way far.. i want people physically to be with me.. to be happy.. and that's why i make new frnds.. to becme happy.. but no..
i want solutions dr. i don't have any
Dr.
We can not stop someone to go out of our life
Dr.
xxxx the solution is to find happiness in your own company
Dr.
Learn it slowly but allow yourself for that
Dr.
If you keep finding happiness in others company you will most of the time find yourself un happy
Dr.
Because that is something which is not in your control
dr. may i ask you somthing..
Dr.
Sure
can u pls help me with how smeone can be happy with themself.. like 24 hours u have to be with yourself.. and be happy.. you don't have people to share things with them.. you don't have people to share you small small happiness and saddness with.. you don't have someone to talk about how was your day.. you don't have someone to share your food with.. you don't have someone to go and have party ya to share your random stupid cute thoughts with.. like how is that possible..
how can someone be happy with this..
Dr.
Honestly xxxx, I am also learning it... But will share my story... So most of my work involves work from home so I have to be infront of my desk for work at home... I am completely outgoing person... I love to socialize however due to work whole week I have to be with myself
Dr.
And I times I find it difficult
Dr.
However what I have started doing is accepting the reality.... And solve my own problems my own way
Dr.
Have started listening to lot of songs, enjoy my tea or coffee with nice book
Dr.
Bing on my favourite series
Dr.
And many more things which help me forget the need of others
Dr.
It's a process xxxx
Dr.
It's tough but life teaches you this
Dr.
I have taken a solo trip to which helped me a lot to be dependable on myself
Dr.
Of course but whenever I get time or opportunity to go out with others, I use it fullest and makes myself happy with those small meetups
Dr.
I am not saying completely disconnect yourself... No that will never happen because we all are social animals
Dr.
But if required enjoy your own company too
Dr.
When you will start respecting yourself, you will realise people will respect you and your company way more
dr. to becme busy is what i can do.. but at the end of the day.. when u sometimes need someone to hug.. u find no one around.. won't that break u.. when u look around every where u find fake smiles.. fake faces.. won't that make your heart cry.. i just want that one frnd to who will be there for you everytime.. i can be independent.. but that one day when you need someone so badly and you found no one around.. that is what is breaks u.. and now that is what is happening to me.. i just have no one
and that is the reason i m going home.. so that atleast for a weekend i can again feel loved..
Dr.
You will find someone xxxx
Dr.
But if you keep sad and upset yourself with a past how will you give yourself second opportunity
Dr.
It surely breaks you when there is no one... But that's the reality and you have to face it even though it looks scary
before i was having 2.. now i have no one.. and i think its cmpletely my fault that i have no one right now.. and i think that is the main reason i m not ready to give myself a 2nd chance
Dr.
However just because one train is gone ... Not necessary that you lose on catching that train again
Dr.
You just have to be patient
Dr.
Go and say sorry to them you can always try to earn them back
Dr.
But if they still decide to move on then that's the reality xxxx
Dr.
Probably all this happened so you can start being independent
Dr.
Learn from this incident
dr. means even u r saying that i should say sorry to them.. and that its my fault that they left me.. they think i don't love them.. after giving my 500% at the end i got to hear that they think that i won't understnd.. that was my fault dr. i should say sorry
Dr.
No we don't say sorry only because it's our fault
Dr.
At times we say it because we have to be mature somewhere in life and take one step ahead
Dr.
If someone else can't do it
Dr.
That's called being mature than giving another opportunity over our ego
Dr.
And*
yess i think i can try that.. and i m sorry for being rude to you.. just some bad thoughts made me do that.. i m really sorry dr.
Dr.
No xxxx.. don't say sorry
and i will talk to them.. i don't now what will happen nextbut i now that i need them badly..
Dr.
I understand
Dr.
Sure xxxx
Dr.
Don't keep your hopes high
Dr.
Bug you can definitely try and be mature person here
Dr.
All the best xxxx
Dr.
But*
thanku so much dr. thanku for listening..
Dr.
No problem
Dr.
I hope you have the answers you were looking for, do check in with me tomorrow if any new questions come up.
yes dr.
Dr.
Do you have any doubts or wish to share anything more?
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